• Why it’s ok to quit and how to work it out

    Why it’s ok to quit and how to do it

    Have you ever hit a wall, felt like your life was going in the wrong direction or simply not working? The past few months I spent time focusing on myself, my needs and the direction of my life. After overcoming all I have in the past few years, combined with my achievements (I went from homeless single mum to CEO which you can read more about here, here and here), I love my life, but something was missing. I no longer felt I was living the life I wanted, instead, I was living the life expected of me and a lot smaller because of issues in my personal life.

    How to know when to quit

    Pushing through, looking for the opportunities in obstacles and creating a life you love are what I am all about. Is what you are pushing through for still serving you? Is it still your purpose?

    When everything you are doing is draining you and feels like it’s too much, it’s time to reevaluate your choices. Look at your reason why. Why did you start this journey, this goal, business or whatever you are doing? What motivates you? What do you want to see?

    If your reason why still resonates with you, look at the other elements of your life to see what the cause of exhaustion or frustration is. Check you are getting enough sleep, the food you eat is fuel instead of junk and if you have proper systems in place to support your goals (more on that below).

    The reason why you are doing something generally won’t change, how you do it or if it still aligns with your life might. Once something no longer fits, or doesn’t align and it’s not just the systems you have in place, it is probably time to move on.

    My ‘aha moment’ for my reason why

    When I was going through my own wanting to quit moment recently, I realised my reason why hadn’t changed. I am still as passionate as ever about ending homelessness plus helping Australians make and save money. My idea of how wasn’t working though and as a result, it drained me.

    Doing a strategy session for my site, The Thrifty Issue, we uncovered my core motivation is empowering women through financial independence. It’s why I write about ways to make and save money, why I speak publicly about homelessness and share my story. Under this comes my goal to help Australians get off Centrelink. Knowing this helped me redirect my energy and reach more people in a short period than I had in a long time. This was one piece of the puzzle for me – solidifying my true thy.

    How Do You Quit?

    How you quit will depend greatly on what you are quitting. Quitting a job is extremely different to quitting a hobby. Work out what it is in your life you want to remove then decide on the best course of action. Some things such as a business can have an exit strategy such as hiring someone to do your job in the business or sell it. Other options such as changing jobs can be done with practical steps including updating your resume and applying for other jobs. Learning to quit or remove toxic people from your life, quit putting everyone else before you and options like that are harder and take more time.

    Quitting your job

    Who doesn’t dream of quitting their job at some point? Why do you want to – is it the workplace, the culture or the actual work? Defining why you want to quit will help your mindset. Try to go to work with a positive attitude, list out 3 things you love about the place and each time you have to engage with a colleague you don’t like, quickly think of 3 good things about them. This small mental shift can help keep you positive, grateful and improve your work life.

    Update your resume, get on LinkedIn to create a great profile (or update yours and let recruiters know you are looking), actively seek out other work and let your networks know you want to switch jobs. Complaining and hating on everything won’t change your life, taking action will.

    Next, work towards FIRE – Financial Independence, Retire Early. Decide on the age you want to retire, how much you need, how you can invest, reduce your living expenses and make a plan to make it happen.

    Quitting toxic people

    At some point in your life, you will cross paths with toxic people. Jim Rohn said “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” which is a belief held by and reiterated by all successful people. Everyone in your life counts and impacts you as a person. If you hang around people who complain all the time, it will bring you down. I’m not saying you can’t volunteer and help those who need it or you should only spend time with super successful people. Be aware who you spend time with will influence who you are as a person.

    Just because you live in a certain area or are related to someone, doesn’t mean you need to spend time with them. Toxic people are those who will bring you down, suck you of all your resources, leave you feeling depleted and usually are narcissistic. Read The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F*ck to help with some of this.

    Quit living a life you don’t love

    Do you constantly say yes to everyone and everything, leaving no time for yourself? Learn to say no. Take time for yourself. Decide what you want in your life then learn the strategies you need to stop doing all the stuff which drains your energy. For some tips on this and getting more time, check out this post.

    How do you know what you want?

    On holiday in Geelong. Photo by www.travislongmore.com

    Sometimes when we think we want to quit everything it is more we lost our way or lost ourselves. So how do you get back on track, know yourself and know what you want?

    Know your personality

    Do the Myer-Briggs test or 16 Personalities (my preferred one) and learn more about yourself. I paid for the premium option and have read it over, printed it out, highlighted relevant parts and learnt a lot. Anyone who is close to me has not been surprised to learn I am an ENFP or “Campaigner”.

    Your personality and these profiles give great insight into why you think the way you do and do the things you do as well as offer advice for relationships, career and your life.

    Define your core values

    This is something I have done before and each time it is pretty much the same. Family comes first to me, always. Health, integrity, independence and financial stability are all important to me. Read this to work out more about your own core values.

    Create a morning routine

    The Miracle Morning is a great book about Hal who was officially dead for 6 minutes, changed his life and created an amazing routine.Ok, it is way more than that, but essentially, having the right morning sets up your whole day. I know when I do my proper morning routine I am more productive. My morning routine looks like this:
    Get up, brush teeth, drink water, make my bed then exercise and meditate (currently this is yoga and I use YouTube for the sessions).
    Read, write in my journal, do my affirmations, have breakfast then get my kids up and ready, walk them to school, listen to a podcast on the way home then once home get stuck into work.

    Fix the areas that need fixing

    Which areas of your life need help? Do you need to take up exercise and focus on your health? Could you do with a financial overhaul? When is the last time you read a book?

    Do a proper evaluation of your life, what is working, what isn’t then look at how you can fix anything you feel needs fixing to maximise your life. For me, I have found health and finances go hand in hand. When I am in control of both, the rest of my life works well. When either one of them slips out of control, the rest of my life struggles.

    Set some goals

    Are you working on any goals at the moment? If not, why not? I have my 10 steps to success with goals here. One of the things I realised was missing for me in the past few months was lack of direction with my goals. Since getting clear on them again, writing them in permanent marker and redoing my vision board I am achieving more each day and feel fulfilled.

    Take it one day at a time

    Do not try to tackle everything at once! You will overwhelm yourself and fall in a heap. Pick one thing and focus on strengthening that habit for a good 21 to 30 days first. Add more as you feel you can. Say you want to get healthy and lose weight but the idea of joining the gym and going hard out is too much. Start with 10 squats and 10 pushups or simply walking each day instead of taking the care. Then the following week walk further or add in squats etc. Take baby steps.

    While you are doing the actions, read books, blogs and listen to podcasts relevant to what you are trying to achieve to help you stay motivated. Some of my favourite books are here.

    What life do you want?

    Despite all the quotes out there about not quitting, in my experience, if something is detracting from your life or is no longer the right goal for you, it is ok to quit. Generally, a change of direction is more likely.

    Don’t quit things just because they get a little hard. Pushing through, developing resilience and striving for something builds character, but you need to be doing it for the right reasons.

    What am I quitting?

    I reached a breaking point, listed my sites for sale and was going to be done. After going through the above steps I realised what I need to quit is taking a backseat and being scared. Since I moved to Melbourne I had scaled my life back, I had reduced the volunteer and activism I was involved in heavily in Canberra and I lost myself.

    Being in court with my ex-husband over custody (which is still going), I shrunk myself. I was scared about what I was doing online because I didn’t want him to use anything I wrote or did against me in court, even though none of it is bad and it impacted every area of my life. It’s been going on for a while and it isn’t going to end anytime soon.

    So right now, I am quitting fear. Being scared has stopped me living the life I want. This year will be a year of new. Trying new things such as a dance class I always wanted to, attending Moomba, doing tourist things here in Melbourne, trying dishes from different countries and saying yes more.

    Volunteering, speaking at events, doing consulting and mentoring work I love. Focusing on the things which bring me joy and are missing from my life. I won’t let fear hold me back anymore.

    You’ll find me mostly at www.thethriftyissue.com.au sharing ways to make and save money, but I’ll also be speaking at events, getting back into volunteering and other work.

    With my site, The Thrifty Issue

    What are you quitting?

    Comments Off on Why it’s ok to quit and how to work it out
  • 10 steps to success with goals

    One of the most common questions I get is how I set and achieve my goals. I like to set big goals and work hard to achieve them. It can be hard finding balance, or even knowing what goals to set, so here is everything I do, from the idea right through to completion.

    1.) Know yourself

    Take the time to work out your values, create a personal mission statement, and know what you want in life. Setting goals because they sound good but go against your personal value system or goals that everyone else is doing is setting yourself up to fail. You need to know yourself, what you want and what your values are to be able to set and achieve meaningful goals. Find your passions and focus on the life you want when setting goals.

    2.) Clear your head

    I get out a few pieces of paper and ‘brain dump’. I write down all my ideas, aims, desires, goals and anything I think I want to do. I generally have a piece of paper for the following life categories: health, finance, career, community, relationships, travel/life experiences, home and so on.

    3.) Prioritize

    Which goals are most important or most urgent? Making decisions is not easy. I have posted here some of my methods for making decisions. When it comes to setting my goals I write down each goal on its own piece of paper, the timeframe I want to achieve it in and the pros and cons of the goal to help establish goals to achieve first.

    4.) Plan of action

    When I set goals I make sure they are SMART – Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Time-Bound. I write down exactly what I want to achieve, how I will do it and the steps I need to take to achieve that goal. Sometimes this means creating mini goals, other times it is a simple 3 step process. This is crucial. A goal not written down and without a plan is just a wish.

    I love this tip by Glen at Free From BrokeIf you want to be successful with your goal then you have to make it easy to work on it.  You have to know yourself and eliminate as much friction as possible. For example, if you want to save more then set up automatic transfers for when you get paid.  This way you don’t have to think about putting the money into savings.” He also has a great post on 5 reasons your goals fail and what you can do to make yours succeed.

    Todd R. Tresidder, of Financial Mentor, who also has a great goal setting system on his site here says: “The key to converting your goals into tangible results is to reverse engineer the goal into action steps. For example, weight loss is a common goal everyone understands. You might convert the goal of losing 35 pounds into something more tangible like 2 pounds per week for the next 20 weeks. Then you further break the goal down into regular exercise habits and eating healthy. Then you break it down one step further into a daily accountability structure of exercising a minimum of 5 days per week allowing for two off days every week and eating healthy 6 days a week allowing for one unhealthy day. The objective is to create a daily/weekly habit that you can actually follow through on that will produce the desired goal.

    You then create a 20 week implementation schedule that might start with daily walks around the block and progressively increases each week into longer walks at a more aggressive pace punctuated with brief runs as your conditioning improves. Notice how this process converts the intangible goal of losing 35 pounds into daily action steps that are totally realistic that you can be held accountable for and know exactly how to take action on every single day. You never have to wonder if you are on track or not. You know exactly what to do and by when. The key point is to take any large goal and reverse engineer it down to realistic daily actions that will produce the desired result then create an accountability system to help keep you on track. That is how you convert goals into results.”

    5.) Create a motivation wall

    Once I know the things I want to achieve and want in my life I get visual and create a motivation wall. It includes a vision board, my calendar, motivational quotes or affirmations, saving graphs and anything I am working on. It’s on my bedroom wall so it’s the first thing I see every morning and last thing I see at night. The image below is an old vision board of mine.

    Vision board

    Peta of Great Googa Moogas has a vision board too. Her goal setting tip is “don’t just pick a general goal, be specific and then outline how you will achieve that goal, break it down into bite-sized steps and pin it up where you can see it. Crossing off the steps will help keep you motivated and including a vision board will help make the goal more real.”

    6.) Reminders

    To help me stay focused and remember what I am working towards I create reminders. I write my goals in permanent marker on my mirrors, I change the background and screensaver on any device to match my goal along with changing passwords to match my goals.


    Tracie from Penny Pinchin’ Mom says “My BEST tip is that you have to write it down and put it where you are reminded by it daily.  I recommend putting it on your refrigerator or your bathroom mirror so you can’t help but see it many times a day. We did this when we were working our way out of debt.  We’d update our goal with the amount of debt remaining and that just kept us pushing to drop that number to zero – and it worked!”

    7.) Accountability

    Lance Cothern from Money Life and More recommends an accountability partner.Whenever you’re setting goals that you actually want to get accomplished, I always suggest finding an accountability partner for that goal. What’s an accountability partner? It is someone that you can share your goal with that will be interested enough in it to continue to ask you how you’re doing. In essence, by telling someone else you’re going to complete a goal, you’ll feel like you’re letting them down if you don’t complete it. That’s some great motivation when you need it most!”


    I have a private Facebook group with my sisters where we discuss our goals and other topics. Being accountable to someone pushed you to stick to your goal.

    8.) Motivation

    My vision board, reminders and accountability are all great motivators. What motivates one person is different to what motivates another. I have stacks of posts on motivation here. My motivation has been the life I want for my daughters and I. Whenever I am faced with a choice or a goal gets too hard I think about my daughters, the life I want for us and go spend some time with them or I use tools such as motivational books, podcasts, webinars, courses, friends, anything which motivates me to get back on track.


    MF Dasko of Stapler Confessions has a great method for motivation. I believe two things must happen. You have to plan for something bold to happen in the future and you must work up to this slowly… I use a calendar in my room to track my daily progress. I give myself an X every single day that I work towards my goal. After a few Xs it becomes addictive and you want more. Creating accountability through sharing your goal with the supportive people in your life can be a great way to stay on track. Whether it’s quitting smoking or paying off debt, it always helps to celebrate successes with a cheerleader and discuss challenges with a confidant.” 

    9.) Reassess

    Life changes and sometimes the plan of action you had for your goal is not the best course of action to help you achieve it.
    Andrea Travillian from Take A Smart Step suggests: “The biggest mistake I see when working on goals is setting them and never reassessing how it is going and if that goal is still right. I recommend that at a minimum you review your progress once a quarter and at the same time determine if you need to revamp your approach to achieving that goal. The way we think we will achieve a goal, might not actually end up being the best approach in the end. You only know this and can adjust to stay on track if you are taking the time to analyze your results.  For example, when I was writing one of my books I was struggling to get it finished (more so than the others) so I sat down did a review of how I was going about it and why that was not working and then came up with a new plan. Finally, after doing this two times, I finished the book!”

    10.) Completion

    Celebrate goals as you achieve them. Revel in your success. You don’t have to jump straight into the next one. Sometimes completing the goal is reward enough, but sometimes it is nice to go out to dinner/buy some new clothes/have a party/go on a holiday as a reward for achieving your goal. Recognize and celebrate your achievements.

    Extra Tips

    Along with the method I outlined above, I also have specific tools and things I do every day to ensure I achieve my goals.

    1.) Say my goals. I look in the mirror and repeat my goals, with conviction, as if I have already achieved them.
    2.) Write them daily. I write them in my journal each night and what I did to get closer to my goals.
    3.) Use a planner. While many people love to plan everything online, I love physical pen and paper. This year I am using a bullet journal. You can get the exact one I use here .(affiliate link).
    4.) Self-care. Make sure you look after yourself, sleep well, exercise and eat properly. Going hard after a goal while neglecting everything else is a recipe for disaster! 

    I would love to hear what tips you have for setting, focusing on and achieving your goals. What goals do you currently have?

  • Tips for Getting Out of Debt on a Limited Budget

    Living in debt is an extremely stressful experience, especially for people who didn’t realize the magnitude of the consequences signing up for a debt may carry. Many people end up with a large debt burden on their shoulders just by making some of the most common mistakes when borrowing money.

    Getting out of debt is doable, especially if you are a disciplined and consistent person. Knowing how to deal with debt collectors is a valuable skill also. Sometimes it means you must restrain from certain little indulgences here and there, but remember – the end justifies the means.

    Check out these neat tricks on how to change your spending habits in order to save a little extra to pay off what you owe.

    Plan ahead and cut costs

    No magic wand here really. In order to save your money, you need to break down how much you earn and how much you need for decent living. Put fancy things aside, be selective with treating yourself and aim for a ‘no spend month’ by only spending on necessities.

    It’s not survival, it’s presenting a little bit of discipline into your consumerist habits that brought you where you currently are.

    The reasonable thing to do is make a list of all the things you need when you go shopping, or all the bills you will have to pay by the end of the month, then stick to it. If you make realistic plans and you stick to them there is a lower possibility you will spend more than you actually need on a monthly basis.

    Don’t hesitate to reach out for help

    Financial advice is everywhere and many will try to influence you without knowing your full situation. Seek help from professionals instead. They will help create a financial plan, can give proper advice plus sometimes negotiate on your behalf. If you are on a limited budget and struggling to repay all your debts, sometimes a debt agreement can be a viable solution for your budget. That way you will be available to pay the same amount of money on monthly basis no matter the size and duration of the loan. You can read more about debt agreements here.   

    Multiply your savings

    All of the above will only result in you saving a little bit more from your salary. But what if there is a way for you to actually make more money out of what you’ve saved?

    Finding ways to make more money is one of the best things you can do in conjunction with the tips above to improve your finances. Plus, if you put that extra money into your debt, you will pay it off faster.

    Look for things you can do on the side such as freelance work, renting out a room or selling things online to help make more income. Then once your debt is clear, look at ways to invest and increase your money further.

    Comments Off on Tips for Getting Out of Debt on a Limited Budget
  • How to get out of debt and how to deal with debt collectors

    Debt is crippling and once you have some, it can be hard to pay it off and get back on track financially, especially if you are reliant on Centrelink.

    When I was a kid, my dad was a debt collector, so he has offered some tips. I have spoken to a few others about dealing with debt collectors and helped various people pay off exteme amounts of debt.

    Tips to pay off debt:

    1.) Know how much you owe

    Don’t bury your head in the sand and deny how much you owe, it only makes it worse. Write down all your debts with their full amount, interest rate and how long they have left to pay off. In the case of interest free loans, write down when the interest free period expires because once that hits, the interest is intense.

    Also, make a note if any have massive fees for paying them off early, as you will need to factor them into your payment plan.

    This should be part of your budget, but many miss it. (For tips on creating and sticking to a budget, check out this post).

    2.) Prioritise your debts

    How you pay off your debt is up to you. Some people prefer to start with the smallest debt first and psychologically this works. It makes you feel you are paying off your debt faster when you clear a small one. Dave Ramsey recommends doing it this way.

    Financially, it is better to pay off the debt with the highest interest first. Sometimes those debts are so huge it feels like you will never pay them off though. If you are disciplined and can pay them off despite it possibly taking longer to clear your first debt, you may save more interest this way (depending on the interest with your debts).

    3.) Debt snowball

    Once a debt is paid off, put all the money you were throwing at that debt onto the next debt. Both it’s monthly repayment and any extra you put on it. You pay off your debt much faster this way. Once your second debt is clear put all the money onto your third debt and so on.

    Keep making minimum repayments on all your debt, but select one debt to be the one you put any extra money on to get rid of it quickly.

    Resist the temptation to splurge or treat yourself once the first debt is clear if you have more to pay off. Focus on getting the debt clear.

    4.) Find ways to make extra money

    Chances are you’re in debt because you couldn’t afford things, then it got out of control. Many people struggle to make ends meet, let alone pay off debt.

    To pay it off, you need to find ways to make more money. I have a few articles on my other site, The Thrifty Issue which might help:
    51 ways to make money from home
    10 ways to make $10,000
    10 ways to make $1,000 this month

    5.) Reduce credit limits

    As you pay off your debt, you can request the credit limit be reduced. For instance, say you have a $5,000 credit card. Once you pay off $500 you can request to drop the limit to $4,500 and do this until with each step until the credit card is gone.

    By reducing the limit, you can’t spend on it again.

    Be aware, opening and closing credit cards and other debt will impact on your credit score and borrowing capacity. I still recommend living debt free though. You can check your credit score for free and track it monthly with sites such as https://www.creditsavvy.com.au/

    Why care about your credit score? Every application for credit such as a loan or credit card goes on your file. Any bank or company lending you money checks your score and will offer an interest rate based on the credit score. A good score gets you a better rate. A bad score means a higher rate. Each application lowers your score, makes it less likely to get approved and makes it harder to get credit.

    6.) Negotiate

    Start with your current lender. Asks for a better deal such as reduced interest, no bank fees or similar. Do some research and start comparing providers, then if needed, switch. Be aware though, this will impact your credit score, which in turn impacts your interest rate. Check before applying how likely you are to get the loan and what a likely interest rate is. If you cannot switch, don’t apply.

    7.) Save in every area possible

    Go over your budget and look at every area you can make cuts, then start transferring those savings onto your debt. For tips on ways to save money, I have 31 ways to save $200 or more here, plus loads of saving articles here.

    8.) Save an emergency fund

    Dave Ramsey recommends $1,000. Personally, I have usually needed $2,000 in an emergency. This can be difficult to save when trying to pay off debt at the same time. Try to save this emergency fund first before smashing the debt. This way, when you pay down the debt if an emergency happens, you don’t need to put it back on the credit card. It helps break the debt cycle and the mentality that you need a credit card.

    9.) Change your thinking

    Debt is not essential. Many think you cannot live without a credit card or personal, but you can and you will feel so much better for it. Get used to spending with your own money instead of borrowing money.

    Check out 6 ways to easily reduce debt.

    How to deal with debt collectors

    If you can negotiate with the people or bank you owe money to before it goes to debt collectors, it is better for everyone. People and companies just want to know they are getting their money back. Work out a payment plan, do not miss payments and do everything you can to show you want to pay the debt off and will. Ask to go to the financial hardship section of the bank if you need and get a brief pause or do whatever is needed to ease up the finances temporarily before it ends up with debt collectors. Your interest will continue to accrue but you will be helped.

    If it ends up with debt collectors, here are a few tips.

    1.) Get all your paperwork in order

    Have all your debt paperwork in one file which is easy to access so you can see at a glance what the terms and conditions are, what can be expected and how much you owe.

    2.) Talk to them

    Don’t avoid the phone calls. You need to get is sorted and if you ignore it, it will get worse. Debt collectors try to catch you off guard, so when they call, ask for a moment to get your paperwork together or request to call them back (or have them call you) at a specific time when you are available and ready to discuss it with them. Do not do this then avoid the call. You must take it. They will push to get their answers and an immediate payment on the spot. Be calm, clear and keep repeating you will discuss it when you have your paperwork and are ready.

    3.) Make a payment on the spot if you can

    This is a gesture of goodwill and shows you are willing to pay. If you cannot afford what they push for, don’t agree to it. Agree only to what you can afford to pay. If you can afford to make a larger payment which is close to the total amount, you may be able to negotiate the payment down to the amount you have and get it cleared completely.

    4.) Arrange a payment plan

    A debt collector will push for the highest amount possible. Do not agree to it if you cannot afford it. If you can afford $20 be firm and say it will be $20 a week for as long as it takes. They can’t get blood from a stone and some money is better than no money.

    5.) Get the amount reduced

    As mentioned in tip 3, you may be able to get the total reduced. This is often offered when a debt has been outstanding for a long period or you are closer to the end of the debt. I have managed to knock thousands off debts for friends by offering the debt collector a lower amount in full today or asking what the lowest total they could pay would be if they paid in full today. This doesn’t always work and ultimately, you did accrue the debt, so should pay it in full. However, for them, most of the money is better than no money.

    What tips do you have for dealing with debt?

    You might also like these real stories of paying off debt
    $3,000 debt cleared in 1 month!
    How we cleared $90,000 (I know these guys personally and they started unemployed on their debt journey. But they prefer to remain anonymous).

  • How to budget for large irregular expenses

    “How do I budget for large, irregular expenses?” is a question I get a lot. As part of my goal to help 1,000,000 people survive, thrive and where possible, get off Centrelink, I am working with experts to answer these questions and more. You can find all posts relating to Centrelink here. Today, Cath, the founder of Get Money Wise shares tips to budget for irregular, large expenses. Note, there is an ‘affiliate link’ if you use the code contained in the post to get the bonus money.

    Budgeting for irregular and large expenses can be a tricky balancing act, especially when on a low income. Most of us, at least once, have had that one bill which snuck up on us when it arrived in our letterbox.

    Something we had forgotten we need to pay each year. Like car registration, an insurance premium or our annual check-up at the dentist.

    With the day to day outgoings associated with our weekly or monthly budget, these irregular large expenses can be easy to overlook.

    The pay check to pay check cycle

    I recall a time about ten years ago now when I first moved in with my now husband. He received his car insurance renewal and registration yet had absolutely no money in his account to pay them.

    This was a fairly regular occurrence for him. As a part-time chef who got paid in cash, he was stuck in a pay check to pay check cycle.

    He wanted to be better with money and not need to ask his parents for a loan when these big expenses came up. He was one of the lucky ones though, not all of us are fortunate enough to have a backup plan of someone else being able to help us out when our income falls short.

    He was suffering from overwhelm about how he could possibly afford to pay these large bills on his small wage.

    Around this time we had decided as a couple we wanted to get married and save for our first place. So we needed to make sure we were being wise with our money. I was only on a very low entry level wage and my now husband only worked part time as a chef so money was tight.

    I had always been relatively good with my money so went to work creating us a yearly budget.

    Predictable yearly costs

    I knew I needed to include the weekly costs like groceries, petrol and rent or the mortgage. I needed to come up with a way to make sure I also had money set aside for the bigger periodic costs.

    These are expenses you know will occur, but only happen once a year or perhaps once a quarter.

    They fall into two categories – mandatory and non-mandatory.

    Mandatory expenses include such things as insurance premiums, car registration, electricity and water bills.

    Non-mandatory expenses are those you do not have an obligation to pay but are things you know you are likely to need money for. Christmas or birthday gifts and kids clothing are what come to mind for me in this category.

    How to budget for predictable expenses

    Since some of the yearly bills are less memorable ones, to ensure you don’t let one slip through the cracks go back in time one calendar year. Look at all your bank records and note down what the bill was and what month it was paid.

    Put in some thought into if you think you will have any new expenses you didn’t have last year but you will incur in the next twelve months. People often overlook this and it can catch you off guard.

    I treat my non-mandatory expenses like Christmas and birthday gifts as one-off expenses too, so I save a little bit each fortnight for them. Rather than being left short when the time comes.

    Once you have your total yearly expenses, divide it by how often you get paid. I am paid fortnightly so I divide all of the yearly costs by 26 and ensure I put this money aside straight away on payday.

    Whilst this can take a little bit of time the first time you do it, it is a total game changer for your money management so it is worth the investment of time. The following years budget becomes a lot easier as you already have a template to work off.

    Where to keep your bills money

    It’s a good idea to keep a separate bills bank account. I set up an automatic direct debit after pay day with the exact amount I have worked out I need automatically transferred each fortnight.

    A high-interest savings account is usually a good place to keep the funds. Whilst the interest rates aren’t amazing, they are higher than your day to day transaction account.

    Choose an account which allows you easy access to your funds and includes a BPAY facility to make it easier to pay your bills when they come due.

    Find out what works best for your needs in terms of account set up. I have one general savings fund and track what is assigned to each category via a spreadsheet.

    Other people find it best to open several savings accounts, one for bills, one for a holiday fund, one for emergencies and so on.

    My best advice is to find the approach that makes the most sense to you. That way you are most likely to stick with your goals by following what comes more naturally to you.

    (Note from Kylie, I use ING for this banking and split it into a couple of accounts. If you use the code CNW116 we both get a bonus, usually $50 or $100, if you sign up to ING Everyday banking, which is a great kick start to your bills account or savings.)

    Emergency funds

    In addition to your bill account, it is always a good idea to establish a separate emergency fund.

    This account should remain untouched except for unexpected events such as managing through a job loss or to pay for a new appliance if one breaks.

    Avoid dipping into this fund to pay for your irregular large expenses.

    There are different schools of thought as to how much of a buffer you should have in this account. Some suggest starting with building it to $1000. Others say you should look to have at least 3 months living costs saved up.

    My approach is to contribute at least a small amount to this account each pay period. But I make sure my bills account is topped up first.

    (Note from Kylie – I started with $1,000 and have lots of tips on making money quickly here. My preferred minimum recommendation is $5,000 as that is enough for bond on a house and advance rent if you suddenly have to leave your home, it would cover a decent second-hand car if needed, a few months living expenses for most people etc. Then build it to 3 or 6 months).

    Adapting your plans

    Even if you implement all of the information above, this won’t necessarily mean you never have an unexpected expense come up again.

    We are all human, so be gentle with yourself when things crop up.

    If you are armed with a bills and emergency account, you will be much better prepared than you were a year ago.

    Cath is the founder of Get Money Wise. She writes about personal finance which focuses on helping others to change their money mindset and create a path to financial independence. The Resources section of her site has some great tools to help with budgeting, as well as some kids activity books to teach your children about money. Find out more at https://www.getmoneywise.com.au

  • How to afford medical expenses when living on Centrelink

    Do you struggle to afford medical care while living on Centrelink or a low income? Read on to learn how to cover some major medical expenses, afford the help you need and what free help is available for those on Centrelink or low incomes. Disclosure, there are a couple of affiliate links in this post for things I use. Any affiliate income enables me to create more resources, articles and options for you. 

    In May, I had to go to the hospital. My pain levels hit a 9 and 10 (pain more intense than childbirth and at 10 you black out from pain). I lost feeling in my legs, my lower back felt like the muscles were crushing my spine again, I could not breathe and it was terrifying. I spent most of 2015 like this and got no answers then. I saw a neurologist as the doctors suspected with Guillain-Barré syndrome. The neurologist advised me I had either the permanent version of GBS or another permanent condition. I was sent for more tests, physio, acupuncture and other treatments. If I had to pay for all of that out of my own pocket it would have been close to $3,000. There are ways around paying for it all though, which I’ll share in a minute.

    Medical treatment is expensive. The ambulance bill alone was $1,200 then the medication, crutches, other tests, more treatment and changes to my home. It added up quickly.

    In the past few years I have needed:
    4 surgeries
 (and will have an annual surgery for the rest of my life)
    A chiropractor
    Other treatments such as regular doctors visits, medications, specialists such as a neurosurgeon, gynaecologist and I tried naturopaths, Bowen therapy, basically anything anyone suggested, I did. 

My daughters required speech therapy, counselling, hospitalisation at one point and other treatments as well.

    I know how expensive medical treatments can be and I know how debilitating disabilities can be which prevent your ability to earn to afford the medical treatments. It is a vicious cycle.

    I’ll cover the main things I have experience with here from ambulance trips to glasses. I have some experts I am working with to get all this information for you all for future posts, so feel free to leave a comment with specific questions.

    First and foremost, check your eligibility for help from the National Disability Insurance Scheme. Many things such as support people, one off items like wheelchairs, connections and more are available and a plan will be tailored to you if you are eligible. Find out more about NDIS here.

    1.) Ambulance
    If you are on a pension the ambulance is covered. You will likely still be sent a bill, you call and it gets sorted. Do not stress. 

If you can afford private health insurance or choose to have private health insurance make sure your policy includes ambulance cover. You will be sent the bill and you process it with your insurer so you won’t pay but you need to do it quickly.

    Alternatively, you can get ambulance only cover for under $100 a year for a family or under $50 a year for singles. (Thanks, Jess for the tip!)

    This alone can save thousands!

    2.) Dental care
    If you have kids and get Family Tax Benefit A or a relevant payment, you are eligible for some dental treatments for them up to $1,000. You can find out more here.

    For yourself, there is some public dental help available, which varies state to state. Find more information here.

    Some private health funds cover some dental care, in my experience, it doesn’t cover much and isn’t really worth it. if you have private health insurance with extras, find out what you are entitled to. If it’s not worth it, compare and see how much you can drop your premium by getting rid of dental.

    Prevention is the best option with dental costs. These are tips from my dentist:
    – Get an electric toothbrush (they often go on sale for half price).
    – Use it for the full 2 minutes (they have a timer).
    – Floss properly by cupping your teeth with the string and flossing.
    – Use a mouthwash if you want but at the least rinse with water to get the rest of what you flossed from your teeth out of your mouth. Or put sage in water and leave it for a few hours then rinse with that water.
    – Do not wash your teeth right after soft drinks or sugary drinks as this can cause more damage. – 

Limit the sugary, unhealthy foods you consume.
    – Drink more water and make sure you eat well as this also helps your teeth.

If you need urgent dental care such as a filling, root canal etc you can ring to get approximate quotes, see if there are dentists who offer discounts for people on Centrelink or low incomes. Ask if they have ‘cheaper times’ (e.g. some offer a reduced rate on Mondays and Tuesdays, mainly for seniors. I had one in Western Sydney you worked mainly nights, but he offered a discount for day time appointments).

If you need x-rays and have the time, request a referral to a bulk billing place, go get them done, then come back to the dentist. Not all dentists do this, but it can save money.

    Oil pulling is something else some people swear by. I found it did help a little to ease pain, reduce swelling and enabled me to save to pay for the dental treatment I needed years ago. I used coconut or sweet almond oil. However, it’s controversial, so I’d recommend getting professional treatment as soon as you can.

    3.) Doctors visits
    Look for a doctor who will bulk bill. Not many do anymore, or some only bulk bill on certain days. Ask around. If you have chronic conditions, some doctors may bulk bill some of your appointments for you.
    Some tests can be bulk billed, check with your doctor or the lab if needed. Some other tests have a reduced fee when you go back for results too. Find out more here.

    4.) Specialists

    Go on the public waiting list as soon as possible, but be aware you may wait years depending on where you live, what treatment you need etc. When my daughters needed speech therapy it was a 2.5 year wait. I paid for private treatment for them and 3 years later I got a call to ask if I still wanted to be on the wait list with no idea of when I’d be able to get in still. That was Sydney. The wait list in Canberra was 6 months. Huge difference!

    If you have to go private, shop around and ask for a discount. Most do not bulk bill, I found once I outlined my situation in 2015 (long-term paralysis, surgeries etc.) many waved or reduced their fees. The anesthetists dropped their fees from $900 to $0! Call before the surgery and ask.

    Check extra payments or benefits you may be entitled to. With the speech therapy example, because my daughters had other specialists they needed to see as well, I was eligible for carers allowance for them which was just over $100 a fortnight then, and now $124.70 plus you might be eligible for 2 other payments at tax time ($1,000 and $600) which can help.

    For physiotherapy and similar treatments, your GP might be able to put you on a plan which provides you a limited amount of treatments either bulk billed or at a reduced rate. Ask them. I know of plans for physiotherapy, speech therapy and psychology, but there are probably more!

    Psychology and ATAPS I accessed ATAPS when going through my divorce and getting treatment for Borderline Personality Disorder. It cannot be used with the Medicare option, but it has a lot of benefits. Find out more here.

    5.) Glasses and contacts

    I wear glasses and used to spend hundreds each time I needed to replace my glasses. Now I purchase mine from either Zenni Optical (get $5 off with this link) or Eye Buy Direct (get $10 off your first purchase with this link). I have done this for 7 years, had the prescription glasses checked by an optometrist and they were impressed. 
I am almost positive Zenni Optical is used by SpecSavers. Their frames for $99 or two for one deals etc are all in the Zenni range. Zenni has prescription glasses from $6.95 plus postage. You can upload a photo of yourself to get an idea of how you will look or try them on in SpecSavers then buy online instead.

    What you need to do:
    – Get your eyes tested.
    – Try on different styles to see what suits your face.
    – Ask for the prescription including your PD or pupillary distance. (I have heard some places, especially private ones do not give them to you, so ask before you get tested).
    – Jump onto Zenni, upload an image of your face, set the little crosses to your pupils then go through and ‘try’ glasses on that you like. Pick the one you want to order, put your prescription details in and save those details in there to refer to later if you need new ones. Order and wait a few weeks.

    I found the quality to be decent. I am more likely to lose my glasses than I am to have them break. In 7 years I have only had 1 pair break and they were not treated well by me and still lasted a few years.

    6.) Medication
    PBS – Some medications come under the PBS and if you have a health care card (or pension card) you get these medications for a heavily reduced fee. This does not cover ALL medications though and the cost of essential medications can be difficult for many. 

Ask for the generic brand. There generally isn’t a difference except for the packaging. Unless your doctor is explicit about you needing the brand name, ask if generic is ok then get the cheaper option from your pharmacist.

    Join reward clubs. Many pharmacies have loyalty programs you can join and collect points whenever you make a purchase which can be redeemed for money off future purchases.

    Keep track of it. Make sure you get your scripts before they expire so you needn’t pay for an extra appointment or script from the doctor. Take your medication as instructed or it won’t be as effective.


7.) Educate yourself
    Learn about your conditions, what helps and what makes it worse. Keep a diary to make notes for yourself as well. 

Use apps to track everything. For example, there are health apps to track everything you do, put in your symptoms when you have them etc. This helps doctors when you have to get treatment as you have a record and specific dates for your issues.

    In my case, Guillain-Barré syndrome is an auto immune disorder so I went on the auto immune protocol diet. It helped a bit, but didn’t completely enable me to recover (however, a combination of other things did).

    For some conditions, certain foods will cause issues. For other conditions, too much or too little movement can impact. Get to know your body, your conditions and what works for you.

    For apps, I have the health app on my iPhone but also downloaded an app for periods (I have PCOS so this has helped know when things are wrong). I also have the Medicare app, my doctor has an app I use to book easily and I’ve used apps like My Fitness Pal to track everything.

    8.) Watch what you eat

    Alcohol, sugar, high acid food and most processed foods can aggravate many conditions, especially ones that have chronic pain involved. 

Do some research to find out which foods help and which foods make your condition worse.

    Right now, I have found the keto or Low Carb High Fat diet has helped significantly.


9.) Stay hydrated
    We underestimate the value of water and how it helps our bodies, helps us heal and reduces many issues. Our bodies are mainly water, if we don’t drink enough it cannot function properly. Drink at least 2 to 3 Litres a day. I like to keep bottles of water in the fridge and sip throughout the day.

    10.) Try other options

    For starters, most people go to the doctor for sniffles and coughs which are viruses and they expect antibiotics. Most of the time the doctor can’t give you anything and the appointment is a waste of money. 

Talk to your pharmacist and they can offer some suggestions or tell you if you need to see a doctor.

    Call the health line on 1800 022 222 before going to your GP or the hospital, they can often advise what you should do.

    Check out medical co ops which have a monthly or annual fee and provide medical care. A list of options can be found here.

    Leave emergency or 000 for ACTUAL emergencies. I cannot stress this enough. Rarely, if ever, have I called 000. Even when blacking out from pain I didn’t want to but was advised to and I ended up with breathing issues, requiring injections and could not leave my home without paramedics, so it was the right call. However, if you are not dying, your condition is not life threatening, then do not call emergency. Use the health line, your GP or pharmacist. People die because emergency services are tied up dealing with non emergencies. 

    11.) Natural treatments

    Do this under proper supervision. I have had more success with various natural treatments for ailments of mine compared to traditional medicine for simple issues like throat infections, minor pain, skin issues etc. More recently, I am now walking and not in daily pain after being told my condition was permanent. It wasn’t traditional medicine that helped.

    For example, when I have a throat infection drinking a lot of water, having honey with lemon and ginger in hot water for a tea, crushed garlic in everything possible and getting plenty of rest works better than any medications I have used. If your throat is sore, stop talking! I know how hard that can be. I’m a single mum with 2 kids and speak professionally. However, whenever I have pushed myself, I end up making it worse, spreading it to my lungs and taking longer to heal.

    Many conditions ease if you eat healthily, get light exercise, sleep well, rest etc. Plus, remember, prevention is always better than cure.

    How do you get the money to pay for medical treatment?

    If you have been struck down by illness or injury, the medical bills are one problem, the inability to work and pay for everything in life is usually another which adds to the stress making it next to impossible to get better.

    1.) Check if you are eligible for Centrelink benefits
    If you are going to be off work for a while, change your income status so your family tax benefit, rent assistance and other payments adjust.
    Check what else you might be eligible for. Disability is notoriously hard to get and it might not be the right benefit for your situation, but you might be able to get Newstart with a medical exemption if you are partnered, they might be eligible for carers payment and allowance. You can find a list of Centrelink benefits with links to each one here. Also, check this part of the Centrelink website to see if there are any one off payments or assistance available to you.

    2.) Private health insurance
    I paid for private health insurance as soon as I became single purely because I wanted the peace of mind that if anything happened or we needed immediate treatment, I would get it. It has paid for itself plus provided me numerous benefits where the staff specifically said if I was a public patient it would not be happening.

    One example of that is we ended up in emergency for my youngest daughter. They were reluctant to take us in despite my GP and health line both saying she needed to be there. They took me because I was a private patient. Once inside, after various tests, the doctor on call asked if I felt I could look after her in her condition at home. I knew there was something extremely wrong and he was dismissing me. I said no, I am a single mum and we cannot go home with her in this condition. They admitted us because I had private health insurance.

    Next, my phone went flat and I didn’t know the phone numbers to call anyone to get my other daughter. I was told, if we were not private patients they would have called children’s services and taken my eldest until someone could be contacted. Instead, as we were private and had a private room, they brought in a recliner and we had a bench, so all 3 of us slept there.

    In the morning I was able to get hold of family who picked up my eldest. A pediatrician came and my daughters condition was so severe she was kept in hospital for 3 days and advised to remain home from school for another 2 weeks with follow up appointments once we were discharged.

    It sucks, but sometimes, you get further with private health insurance than you do public. If we had been sent home, I hate to think what could have happened to my daughter.

    If you already need the assistance, private health insurance probably isn’t going to help. If you have it, check what you can claim and what assistance you can get. Compare to ensure you are on the best deal and that you are covered for what you need. Many private health insurance extras aren’t worth it. Hospital or ambulance can be, especially if you have medical issues or are not eligible for a pension/low income card.

    3.) Find alternative ways to make money
    A job is not the only way to make money. If you have a condition like I did, where some days the pain is so excruciating you cannot do anything, or where you are paralysed or mental conditions where some days getting out of bed is a struggle, your earning potential is severely limited and most people will not understand. I do and there are options. Aside from Centrelink benefits, it can be difficult to find other ways to make money. I have 51 ways to make money from home in a free eBook here (and feel free to share that eBook with anyone and everyone!)

    You can also try options like:
    Online surveys – the best ones I have used are here.
    Become a freelance writer (tips on how to do that here) or a virtual assistant (tips on that here).
    Buy stuff to resell (I made almost $9,000 one month doing that).
    Mystery shopping (tips in this article) or market research (tips here) are two options which provide money occasionally.
    Also check out ways to make money while living on Centrelink.

    How do you afford medical care when living on Centrelink?

    Comments Off on How to afford medical expenses when living on Centrelink
  • How to cope when life is falling apart

    It’s no secret my life has been rocky over the past few years with domestic violence, homelessness, health issues and being a single parent.

    What I have kept secret is that the past few months have been less than ideal. I don’t want to go into full details about all of it but it has rocked me and been a lot to process. I am terrible at asking for help. I like being the strong person in the room, the one who has overcome my obstacles and can help everyone else with whatever they need. Unfortunately, we can’t be that person all the time. Life throws curveballs and recently, it felt like my world was falling apart again but I have an amazing support network and somehow always manage to have the right people come into my life at the right time.

    I have learnt so many lessons over the past few years, especially some coping strategies for when life doesn’t go as planned, as well as things to do to get back on track.

    1.) Ask for help

    I am hopeless at this. I keep everything inside until I am at breaking point. I struggle to ask, yet whenever I do I am inundated with the help I need.
    Be clear about what help you need, be open to offers, trust your gut about who is offering the help and why (while most people are genuine, there are some who help because they want something in return) and be someone who helps others where possible.

    Reach out to your community and ask for help.

    2.) Cultivate an attitude of gratitude

    I harp on about this a lot because it makes such a huge difference. With my current circumstances, I have found a few lessons I can be grateful for and the generosity of total strangers and my close family brought me to tears. No matter what the circumstances are, there is always something you can learn/an opportunity you can find or something good that can come from it.

    3.) Take care of yourself

    Another element I have not always been fantastic at and as a result, I have ended up in the hospital twice because I was paralysed in excruciating pain. And by excruciating, I mean, if you check the pain scale doctors use an 8 is childbirth, at 10 you pass out not because of blood loss but because the pain is so intense. Very few people ever experience this level of pain. I hit a 10 due to pain in my spine, I lost the function of my legs, went numb and battled to get better. I have had a cancer scare, struggled with mental health issues at some points in my life, my weight has gone up and down, the list goes on.

    Often, when life is hard, we put ourselves last and everything else becomes harder, we get more stressed and end up taking longer to get back on our feet.

    Take care of yourself by:

    – Eating healthy. Don’t succumb to take away or junk food. Eat nutritious food and make sure you eat properly.
    – Drink enough water. When you are dehydrated your body suffers and your mind can’t think as clearly. Drinking 2L or more a day will have a huge impact on your body and mind.
    – Look and feel good. Get showered, get dressed fully, wear nice underwear, do your hair and makeup. These things might seem superficial, but so many people neglect this when they get stressed or depressed. Take care of yourself and how you look, it will give you a boost of confidence.
    – Do something you love. Do a dance class, go out to dinner, hang out with friends, continue your hobby, read a book, whatever it is, do something you love!

    4.) Pick an affirmation or quote

    When I was homeless, robbed, broke and had left my abusive marriage, there were 3 quotes which helped me cope:
    “I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.” ~ Carl Jung
    “What would you do if you knew you could not fail?” ~ I can’t find the specific source, it was anon for me.
    “Luck is where opportunity meets preparation.” ~ Seneca

    I often repeated these to myself, especially the first one. My life and how it turns out is up to me. I am what I choose to become, what is happening in my life does not define me.

    Find some quotes or affirmations that speak to you.

    5.) Boost your confidence

    When things aren’t going right, our confidence and sense of self-worth takes a hit. Think about what gives you a confidence boost and do it. If you need some ideas check out 20 ways to increase your confidence.

    6.) Be Proactive

    What can you do to take control of the situation and improve your life instead of letting your current situation control you? Work out a plan of action then follow through with it. You may need to tweak it as you go along but if you do nothing, things will either get worse or not change at all. Neither of those are good options. You can make the change you need.

    To get your free copy of the top 10 tips and resources I used to go from homeless to CEO subscribe here:

    What tips would you add?

  • How to make money writing (plus a discount!)

    One of the ways I have made money in the past few years has been through freelance writing. Freelance writing enabled me to earn money from home, rebuild my life and be there for my kids. Plus, I made more money writing in 1 hour than I would in a job. In this article I share some of my tips, plus a discount on my favourite writing course with a great Facebook group – Earn More Writing  – 20% off until Mothers Day with the code SPRING2017

    So how do you make money writing?

    You can make money writing being a journalist, writing copy for ads, writing your own books, writing articles for other websites and more. The bulk of my writing came at first as articles and a book then it switched to be more advertising writing.

    I started with blogging. I created a finance blog and started writing about my goals including ways to make and save money. I look back at my early work and cringe. I had no experience, no qualifications, hadn’t taken any courses and have since deleted many articles from my early days.

    The more I wrote the better I got.

    Then I was asked to write a book. Wiley, a publishing house, saw one of my articles and asked me to turn it into a book. This process taught me a lot about writing and I appreciated it (along with the advance and my book in bookstores), however, 6 years on I have changed, my writing has improved and I would do things differently.

    Once the book was published, I started doing freelance writing. I could not find anything at the time on what rates I should charge, where to look for work (outside the work that was coming to me), professional networks or anything. I made ok money and hobbled along with the few regular gigs I had.

    A few years later I finally had it down. I knew what my areas of expertise were, my writing style improved drastically, I worked out how to charge and what I wanted to do with writing.

    What I wish I knew
    Years, it took me years to work out how to make decent money writing. I wish I had a course at the very beginning like Holly’s. In the years since I started writing, I have taken various courses. I view them as an investment in myself and a shortcut. Instead of taking years to learn things myself, hours every week making mistakes, researching and struggling, I now select a course, do it and implement it into my business, thus saving me so much time and money as well as enabling me to make money faster.

    When I started, I would have loved someone to say to me – here is where to get your dream clients, how to establish yourself as a blog and brand and basically everything you need to know.

    Earn More Writing has 8 modules covering:
    How to Establish a Blog and Brand
    How to Build Your Portfolio and Pitch Clients
    Defending Your Workday
    Making the Transition from Broke Writing to Rich Writing
    Finding (and Keeping) Your Dream Clients
    Getting Paid
    Get More Work by Making Editors Happy
    Taking Your Income into the Stratosphere
    Get Rich Ghostwriting for CEOs (Standard & Pro Only)

    Plus other bonuses and a great group.

    Get it for 20% off only until Monday May 15th with code SPRING2017

  • How to be grateful when everything sucks

    Ever had someone tell you to cheer up, it’s not that bad? Or tell you so many other people have it worse, you should be happy/grateful?

    We all have trials, whether they are big or small, the obstacles in our life can seem impossible and being told to cheer up or someone has it worse doesn’t help.

    I have faced numerous obstacles in my life including domestic violence, homelessness as a single mother, parenting special needs kids, robbery of everything including my underwear, rape, Borderline Personality disorder, paralysis, a cancer scare and multiple surgeries, all within a few years (2012 to 2015). Yet, I have also turned those obstacles into opportunities and founded a company, became an international keynote speaker, won multiple awards including 3 Plutus awards and was a finalist for Young Australian of the Year. My obstacles turned my life around and one of the main reasons I was able to do that is gratitude. It’s on of the 10 tips and resources I used to go from homeless to CEO. You can download a free eBook with all 10 here.

    Disclaimer: before we get into it, I have had mental health issues in my life and take mental health seriously. If you are depressed, have anxiety or feel you need help with your mental health, an attitude of gratitude is great BUT please see a doctor, speak to someone, use support lines if you need such as LifeLine on 13 11 14. I had a psychologist treat me for Borderline Personality disorder and there is no shame in getting help if you need it. Gratitude was one of the things that helped me a lot. 

    How can you be grateful when everything is falling apart?

    Learning to be grateful in dire situations takes practice. Back in 2012, after leaving my abusive husband I was robbed of everything including my underwear. I was devastated. I felt violated, alone and scared. That night, before the police arrived I sat down and wrote why I could be grateful and looked for opportunities in the situation. You can find what I wrote on that night here.

    I included things like we weren’t home, I have insurance, it was just stuff that was taken and I was grateful to have a clean slate as everything I owned which was stolen had connections to my marriage. Now I had nothing.

    It didn’t change the situation but it changed how I felt.

    If you are facing a bad situation, ask yourself:
    – What are the positives that can come from this?
    – What lesson do I need to learn from this?
    – How can I turn this into an opportunity? 

    It didn’t change the fact I had been robbed. It did change how I felt about the situation. By choosing to be grateful and look for positives I was taking control of the situation and owning my experience instead of letting it control me.

    How do you get into the habit of practising gratitude?

    Being grateful, looking for opportunities and lessons in whatever situation you are facing is not going to be an automatic reaction overnight, it takes practice.

    1.) Keep a gratitude diary
    Make a daily habit of writing down at least 3 things you are grateful for every day. I had a gratitude diary I used for this purpose, but you could start each night with writing in your journal 3 things you are grateful for then documenting anything else you want.

    2.) Ask yourself questions
    Put the questions above (what are the positives that can come from this? What lesson do I need to learn from this? How can I turn this into an opportunity), in a note on your phone to refer to when needed. When something is happening and you need help, look at it, ask yourself those questions and write down your answers.

    3.) Have positive discussions
    When you talk with other people, instead of listing out all your problems or complaining about everything, discuss the good things in your life or if you do need to talk to someone about your problems, look for solutions as you do it. We all need someone to talk to and I am not saying don’t ask for help. Talk with whoever you need, look for solutions or ask them to help you look for solutions then take action. Don’t dwell on the negative.

    Studies have shown the positive effects gratitude has on our health, career, relationships and life overall. In my life, when I have been consciously practising an attitude of gratitude, I have found it easier to find solutions to my problems, my personal life improves, I secure higher paying clients and get better work opportunities and more. My brain actively seeks out the solutions I want to the problems I face instead of focusing on the problem. As a result, my life improves.

    When I am not focused on gratitude and I allow negative thoughts to consume me, I spiral down, things in my life don’t go the way I want/need and I find it difficult to dig myself out of the dark hole I end up in.

    Do you practice an attitude of gratitude? What are you grateful for today?

    *An attitude of gratitude should not be used to replace medication, your GP or specialist. If you feel the need to talk to someone or get further help make sure you reach out to places such as LifeLine (13 11 14) or BeyondBlue (1300 224 636) or make an appointment to see your doctor and get whatever help you need.

  • My top 10 tips and resources to change your life – how I went from homeless to CEO

    I get asked all the time how I did it. How did I go from homeless, single mother because of domestic violence to multiple international award-winning CEO?

    It was not easy, there were many steps involved, it took time but I was determined. I have put together this guide which includes everything from attitude and mindset, ways to make money, budgeting, goal setting and more with links, resources, books I loved and anyone at any stage of their life can apply these tips to their life.

    To get your free copy of the top 10 tips and resources I used to go from homeless to CEO subscribe here:

%d bloggers like this: